What women think while having sex?

A Hollywood hunk, ex-lovers, a blue film scene and even what to buy in a grocery store—these are things that women think of while having sex.

Some women have now revealed what really scores with them between the sheets.

Single comedian Shazia Mirza, 34, said that some of her friends revealed that during sex they are mentally writing a to-do list, remembering clothes they have to wash, what they've got to buy at Tesco's or those shoes they love in Selfridges.

And some women even think of men they secretly fantasise of.

"A friend of mine, who really loves her husband, told me that during sex she can't help thinking about all the men she secretly really desires, like Jeremy Beadle and Jeremy Paxman," the Sun quoted her as saying.

"I've been married twice and had many lovers and to be honest, with past lovers I've been so bored in bed, I've taken to compiling mental grocery lists and calculating exactly how many shoes are in the wardrobe (82 pairs)," said author Kathy Lette, 51.

"Most wives are taken for granted. But how we'd like to be taken is by a muscular-thighed Adonis with pecs appeal.

"Luckily sex with Johnny Depp is only the flick of a light switch away. Ah, Johnny - a man whose sex appeal is so deadly it should be registered at police headquarters as a lethal weapon.

"Doing the horizontal tango with George Clooney is also amazing - if only he'd been with me at the time!" she added.

Sarah Millican, 33, is in a relationship, and she said: "I never walk out of a film at the cinema. I'm the same with sex. I always think it might get better. To be honest, as long as I've got a bag of Maltesers, I'm not going anywhere." source

Guide to sexual bliss

Has your sexual regime reached a dead end? Feeling bored? Follow our seven step sexual guide and feel your lost libido recharged ...

1. Change your sexual routine
Analyse your sexual regimen. Is it highly predictable? Is it more of a race to reach an orgasm? If so then perhaps you are in the midst of a sexual rut. So, get up and try breaking the sexual norm by doing the opposite of what you normally do. If you're having sex in darkness, try it in the morning or in the afternoon. If you're always getting down and dirty in the bedroom, enjoy a quickie on the kitchen counter or under the shower. If your man is always on top, surprise him by taking charge. Change your sexual POA to inject freshness into your sex life.

2. Show him the booty
It's not always a great idea to sashay around the house in sexy lingerie and killer heels if you want an instant arousal in your man. Why don't you surprise him by doing the dusting totally naked wearing a sexy G-string or indulge in some sexy shopping together. Men are turned on by what they see - so show him.

3. Make enough time
While sex is supposed to be spontaneous, unbridled passion, the pressure of jobs, children, and managing domestic chores leaves us with no time for sex. Try to give him hints that you are looking forward to a romp. Send suggestive and naughty texts and emails throughout the day. Spontaneity is a great mood builder and the anticipation and build up of something planned can be lots of fun.

4. Look back...
Remember the early days when you were in the first throes of lust when it was hard to keep your hands of each other? Most couples remember their initial years with affectionate nostalgia, so try and recreate those memories. Plan a nice dinner, reminisce about the first time you saw each other, what attracted you initially, and your first date. Recall the sexual connection, the pet names, personal jokes. Put on some sensuous music and dance around your living room to the song you first danced to. Recreate the thrill of having sex by doing it somewhere you might get caught! You share a rich history, so indulge in it a little - those that do are the couples that stay connected.

5. It's good to talk
Never sleep with anger within you. The unwritten rule of a great relationship is to really talk. Be open and honest. Talk about things you don't like in each other, irritating habbits. But remember to discuss the positive traits too - communicate what's important in your relationship; simply talking about why you love each other can help keep the passion alive.

6. Retain the mystery
A little bit of mystery adds spark to your love life. Sometimes when you are living with each other for years, you get too comfortable with each other and tend to be yourself with your partner. So keep the mystery alive and add some spice to your relationship.

7. Indulge your senses
Turn your bedroom into an erotic boudoir by adding loads of silk, satin sheets and colours that make you feel sexy. Cook aphrodisiacal meals together with naughty ingredients that really s-excite the taste buds, or share a candlelit bath with fragrant bubbles and scented oils. Make the time to indulge your senses and you'll soon your libido replenished. source

Celebs who posed nude

Nakedness is still a very hush hush thing for lot of actresses to be portrayed on and off the screen. But there are babes who have no qualms about it. Have a look...

Eva Mendes
: The sexy actress has posed nude for a noble cause for PETA and also to promote the fragrance 'Secret Obsession'Source:Times of India

Spice up love life

Just, understanding, respect and bonding, what else couples can ask for in a healthy relationship to form the foundation for a lasting union.

But little do the couples know that even the most wonderful relationship can go for a toss if love starts fading away. In today's modern times with a hectic workflow to maintain, couples often take each other for granted. And very often, they fail to realise the importance of the little things in a relationship that add the much needed zing in their otherwise boring and dull relationship.

It could be something as simple as saying 'I love you' or wooing your mate with a surprise gift – all that matters is the urge to show that you care and love. These small love gestures might not seem too precious in a relationship, but they can leave your partner craving for more.

Relationship and sex counselor Dr. Geetu Bhardwaj explains, "In every relationship, it's important to maintain a healthy bond. If the couple starts assuming that the other partner knows about your feelings, then there would be very little conversation and sharing of feelings. In such situations, a vacuum starts building and this adversely affects the relationship in the long-run. So it's suggested that small expressions of love should be conveyed every now and then to improve the quality of a relationship."

So the next time boredom starts taking away the fun from your love paradise, try these precious gestures, which can surely bring back the passion like never before...

1. Say that you love : Loving someone is a pleasant feeling, but what's more important is to tell them that you love them. Saying 'I love you' is the best way to connect to your partner and share what you feel for each other.

Love-o-meter : Marriage and relationship counsellor Dr. Medha Sharma says, "Most of the times, the frequency of saying 'I love you' drastically drops as the relationship graduates to another level. So to revive the missing love, couples must seek help from these three words. Women, in general, are keener to say, 'I love you' much too often and in turn they expect the same from their male partners too."

2. Plan a sex picnic : Physical intimacy is probably one of the best ways to bond with your partner. But when it's about recharging the love lull, couples should think out-of-the-box. Forget the bedroom boredom and move out to an exotic spot with your partner.

Love-o-meter : Relationship counsellor, Dr. Amita Mishra opines, "Planning a romantic holiday with your lover can surely be a good idea that will allow you to spend quality time together, which might be tough otherwise. Make sure that the vacation is only intended towards comforting each other and there are lots of pleasure moments, sans any household tensions and office worries."

3. Exchange romantic gifts : While in an affair, you might have gone crazy buying almost all sorts of gifts for your mate. But as it transforms into a long term relationship, these gifts lose their importance. So renewing the habit of exchanging gifts frequently is a sure shot way to make your partner feel loved.

Love-o-meter : "It's not about being materialistic in a relationship, but gifts are an expression of love. A flower, a card, a soft toy, a dress or anything else, whatever you choose for your beloved carries a message which is conveyed through that gift. Thus, exchanging gifts is a great way to make each other feel special," feels Dr. Geetu.

4. Arrange for surprise dinners : Endless luncheons, dinners, parties and night outs are often the routine in the first few months of a relationship. But gradually, it's just home sweet home and cooking in the kitchen which take over. Going out for a surprise dinner is indeed a superb way to woo your partner and bring back the love spark.

Love-o-meter : "A surprise candlelit dinner has always been a hot pick when it comes to arranging something special for your better half. You can plan something really lavish like a special menu and instrumental music, of course, of your partner's choice. Also, act a bit naughty with each other and enjoy each moment like there's no tomorrow," suggests Dr. Amita.

5. Know your partner better : You would often think that you share a great level of understanding and trust with your partner, but there's always more to a couple's chemistry. Couples pay less heed to indulging in intimate conversations with each other and hence they don't know what's exactly going in their partner's life. If you feel that the love bond is getting weaker, take some time out and sit with your mate just to hear them out and bare their heart in front of you.

Love-o-meter : "Initiating a conversation with your partner can really bring you close to them all over again. It gives them a reassurance that you care for them and the comfort zone created henceforth is a sustaining factor in a relationship. Casual or romantic talks often act as catalyst in restoring lost love in your relationship," asserts Dr. Medha. source

Lust or love

In terms of mature relationships and love, most of the times, people fail to distinguish between the true meaning of love and lust .

Every Cinderella longs to find her Prince Charming and live happily ever after. We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Our emotions get magnified, senses get heightened, and we are flying in seventh heaven. It may only last a moment, an hour, a day, but that doesn't diminish its value....

But are you sure it's love that we are talking about?

Why do independent, smart women become emotional wrecks after a romantic break-up? Why do older men gravitate towards younger women? Could it be estrogen and testosterone hormones that addict us to our lovers? In terms of mature relationships and love, most of the times, people fail to distinguish between the true meaning of love and lust.

Have you ever been swept off your feet by a man/woman standing next to you in a queue? Is it merely infatuation, a strong shot of chemistry, or budding love - the real thing? Is Cupid playing a prank or bringing you true love forever?

Love at first sight is not believable. Love takes time. Lust at first sight sounds much more accurate. A study done by testing the blood samples of twenty couples, who claimed to be madly in love for less than six months, revealed that serotonin levels of new lovers were equivalent to the low serotonin levels of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder patients.

It's hard to tell if you are in love because there're no set defining characteristics of love. The dictionary says it's "a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection" or "a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person." What exactly is this feeling or attraction?

The question evoked the thought process of Paramita Roy, a fashion designer; she was surprised that she had never thought of this aspect of her relationship before. After much silence she concluded, "Emotions are not sufficient to suggest whether a relationship is that of love, no matter how strong the attraction may be." Sadly, there is not much awareness to distinguish between lust and love and that is why we have so many emotional and social problems.

Since time immemorial we are hearing that love is blind. But that's a mistake; real love is not blind. Quite the opposite, it is a relationship in full awareness. Over time, through good communication and wisdom, you can start knowing your partner. Gradually, you become aware of his/her flaws and try to work your differences in a healthy way.

Lust, on the other hand, could be perceived as being "blind" as it usually distorts reality, especially when you're so involved that you don't care to find out the real persona of your partner. According to Shruti Bhatia, a psychologist, we often idolize our partners, magnify their virtues and find a way to explain their flaws. This basically happens because many movies, books and songs paint an unrealistic portrait of love, which further builds a false perception of love in our minds.

When Sameer Nagpal, a commercial pilot by profession, was asked whether his six-year-old relationship was based on love or lust, he was quick to reply, "Love is full of sacrifices, trust and respect whereas lust is built on physical attraction, fun and thrills. Real love is commitment. I cannot categorize my relationship as a short sensational affair of love is in the air."

Do some real soul searching today and identify your relationship. If you're in a relationship which does not have fondness, respect, affection, devotion along with passion, it would be wise to back off. Or else, one day those wonderful romantic feelings will be gone and you will wonder what happened to your perfect romance. Accept the fact that you or your partner is not ready for commitment. After all, commitment is a choice which is backed up with actions and maturity. source